Dear Enterprise Rent-A-Car,
I had been planning our family vacation to Nashville since September. Since we would be traveling with 2 teenagers, a rental car seemed to be the most comfortable option. In September, since you are the only rental car agency within a 20-mile radius, I reserved a full-sized car - in my name - through your website.
On April 9th - the day that I was to pick up the rental, my husband and I showed up at 5:00 in the afternoon. I presented my printed reservation - in my name - to the ever-so-smarmy gentleman at the front desk. He looked at my paperwork and said "Oh, we forgot to bring in a car for you." Huh. There was redemption, however, in his next statement..."but you can have that Dodge Grand Caravan for the same price."
His redemption was only temporary.
He proceeded to look over my paperwork (in my name!) again, and I gave him my driver's license. I asked if my husband could please be added as a driver, since we were going a long way and I might get tired. He proceeded to take my husband's driver's license, looked at my paperwork again (did I mention that everything was in *my* name?) and said...
"And sir, where are you employed?"
Yep, that's me - Mrs. Chopped Liver. When my husband said "I'm self-employed" the eyeroll from behind the desk was a little bit much, I think. I offered "I work at Such-and-Such High School, does that count for anything?" And Mr. Smarmy said...
Hang on, boys and girls, it gets much, much worse...
At this point I wanted to get my car/van and go home to pack for our trip. I handed him my debit/credit card, and he said "We don't take those - you need a real credit card with $250 available on it." Then he proceeded to tell me that I *must* have a credit card, because I had to use one to reserve the car. I told him that no, that kind of information isn't required on their website, and every time I've ever rented a car, no information is required beyond a name, address and phone number. When he told me that I was wrong - I must be "remembering wrong," I held my temper. When I explained that no car agency requires a credit card, he then told me that I was completely mistaken, and to please produce the credit card that I used to reserve the car.
Grrr...I *love* being called a liar...
He then told me that yes, they can use a debit/credit card, but I have to produce a recent pay stub and 2 utility bills. I also had to have my card charged with a $250 deposit and the full cost of the rental - ahead of time. Okay, I guess I can see the logic in that, but the sigh that accompanied that statement was really unnecessary.
We went home, I got my most recent pay stub, and I grabbed my cable bill (paid at their office that morning) and my gas bill.
We returned to the office, and I gave him my paperwork. He looked at my pay stub - dated March 31st (remember, this is April 9th) and he said, "Don't you have anything more recent to prove that you still work there?"
Ummm.....I'm a teacher. I get paid every 2 weeks. I had to actually show him on a calendar that no, it hadn't been 2 weeks since my last paycheck.
He looked at my cable bill (paid that morning!! receipt attached and everything!!") and my gas bill (not the proof of payment, just the most recent bill) and he said
"These haven't been paid. Do you have anything that proves that you actually PAY your bills??"
At this point, Kevin told me - "forget this. We're going to go to Cleveland Hopkins Airport and rent a car," and he went outside.
Truthfully, I am very proud of my composure at this point.
I went over each bill, one at a time. See the gas bill? See where it says "Last month's bill, $214, balance at billing, $0?" See where it says "Due on April 13th, $209?" He said "yes, but the payment stub is still attached - it hasn't been paid yet." At this point, I tried to explain to him the concept of Online Bill Pay, and that I pay nearly all of my bills on the computer. No dice.
My cable bill had a receipt attached that said " $141.00 Paid on April 9th. New Balance for Current Billing: $141, due May 8th." He said "Well, you don't pay your cable bill - you have a balance."
At this point, I felt as if I was dealing with a complete Mental Midget. For one thing, it's none of his damned business if I pay my bills - the $400 charge went through on my card just fine. For another, utility bills are used as proof of residency, not as something for him to pore over to determine if I'm a delinquent.
He finally decided (after 35 minutes of this) that he would *allow* us to rent a car. He took me outside to look over the van and make notes of any dings or dents. He then made the ultimate dumb-ass comment...
"The tank is on empty. I hope that's okay."
What?? Since when does a rental car agency give you a car with anything but a full tank??? When I told him that no, that wasn't acceptable (how on earth do you return the vehicle at the same level of fuel when it starts out empty??), he sighed and made a big production out of going inside and telling the other people working there that he *had* to go get gas in the van - he'd be back in a few minutes.
He left, and brought the van back with....half a tank.
When we were leaving, the lady manning the phones said "have a nice vacation!!" and I said "Well, I hope it goes better than the way it started." When I explained that it doesn't exactly make me happy to be treated like a common criminal, Mr. Smarmy had the nerve to be offended. I also felt bad for the lady in the waiting room, who had just been told "we forgot to get you a car - they're sending one from Wooster. It should be in within an hour or so."
We left, had a very nice vacation, and returned the completely cleaned van (with a little bit *over* a half a tank of gas) on Sunday. When my card was "refunded" the deposit, they were nice enough to only give me $240.77 back instead of the $250. Why? I don't know and I really don't care - I can't bring myself to actually call these wonderful people and ask.
The funny thing is - your people called from the Enterprise main office about 3 days later and asked me to complete a phone survey about my satisfaction with their service. When I expressed my extreme displeasure, they promised that somebody would get back to me to discuss the problems that I had.
That was almost 2 weeks ago...
Customer Service, all around!!